What is one-off childcare? What are the tips for surviving it?
The coined term ``one-operation childcare'' has completely taken root. I think there are many people who are familiar with it or use it, but many don't really understand what kind of situation it actually refers to or what the problem is. Let's reorganize it, including some tips for getting through it successfully.
What is one-operation childcare?
The term "One-Op Childcare" was nominated for the 2017 Buzzword Award. The term comes from the word ``one operation,'' which refers to the operation of a restaurant or convenience store by one employee, and refers to one parent or single parent doing housework and childcare alone.
Ministry of Internal Affairs and Communications2021 Social Life Basic Survey Results regarding time spent and daily activities'' shows figures and tables of ``Trends in housework-related time for husbands and wives with children under 6 years old (2001-2021).'' Looking at the 2021 data, wives spend about 3 hours a day doing housework, while husbands spend 30 minutes.Wives spend about 4 hours on childcare, while husbands spend about 1 hour. It can be seen that the burden of both housework and childcare is overwhelmingly on the wife.
This data also highlights the fact that mothers are more likely to find themselves in a one-off situation.
What causes one surgery?
If you are a single mother or father, you will have no choice but to become a one-time parent unless you have a dependable parent nearby who can support you on a daily basis.
If your partner is busy and doesn't spend much time at home, or is tired and unreliable after returning home or on holidays, the burden tends to fall on one parent or the other. If you work alone, your environment will be similar to that of a single family, and you will have no choice but to manage things by yourself.
Unfortunately, it is also true that there are a certain number of people who believe that housework and childcare are women's responsibility. This tendency is even stronger if the wife is a housewife. In such cases, mothers tend to end up doing housework and childcare by themselves on weekdays and holidays.
What's so difficult about having one surgery?
When we ask senior moms and dads who have had one-on-one surgery, many say that the most difficult part of daily care was bathing.
When your baby is a newborn, it is relatively easy to bathe using a baby bathtub, but once your baby starts bathing with you, you will need to be creative with your procedures and arrangements, such as what to do with your baby while you wash your baby's body and hair, and what to do with your baby while you dry yourself after the bath.
Additionally, I have to take my baby with me when shopping for ingredients, which tend to be a lot of luggage, and my baby doesn't sleep peacefully every time I prepare meals, so I have to take care of her while I work, which can be quite a challenge.
Breastfeeding every few hours and crying at night make it difficult to get a good night's sleep, and because I have to work and do housework during the day, I tend to get sleep deprived. You don't have time to rest, and things often don't go as planned when you're dealing with a baby, so you may feel not only physical but also mental fatigue. You may feel lonely every day when it's just you and your baby.
If you continue to push yourself too hard, you may become unwell or suffer from mental illnesses such as depression. It is important to take measures before this happens.
Any tips for getting through it?
It's important not to try too hard to do everything perfectly.
The password is "Maaikaa". As long as you and your family are healthy and safe, you will pass. Take it easy, even if it's a little different from your ideal. Another idea is to utilize home appliances and housekeeping services that reduce the burden of housework.
Some moms and dads may struggle with their tired bodies to finish the remaining housework while their children are sleeping. But don't overdo it. Unless you absolutely have to do it now, put it aside for now and go to bed with your child. You can expect to feel refreshed and regain your physical strength and motivation.
If you are feeling tired or anxious, please talk to someone. If you can talk slowly with your partner, you may be able to get more cooperation. If this is difficult, it may be a good idea to talk to your parents, siblings, or mom friends. You may feel better if you join a childcare club or other group and make friends who share the same concerns. We recommend that you actively utilize external support, such as local government family support, as needed. Don't handle it all by yourself; ask for help from those around you and rely on them.
What your partner can do
Raising children is hard work, both physically and mentally. It's not something that one person can do alone. Even if you are a housewife.
Recognize that collaboration with partners is essential.
In recent years, there has been an increase in the number of men taking childcare leave, and some companies and organizations are actively encouraging their men to take childcare leave. I recommend that fathers first take advantage of childcare leave to focus on childcare.
After maternity leave ends, it may become difficult to divide housework and childcare responsibilities fairly. If you have to come home late from work and find it difficult to participate in childcare, it is important to try to avoid leaving everything to the other person, such as taking on household chores that can be done at night or before work. It would be a good idea for mom and dad to discuss what they can do and what they want them to do, and then decide on their roles.
Although there are some challenges, raising a baby and creating precious memories together is inherently a joyous experience. Moms and dads should relax and support each other to overcome this problem, so as not to overdo it and cause physical and mental damage.
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